i . like . this . ship






charlavail:

wow





theyreoutofcontrol:

Interviewer: “so where do you see yourself in five years?”
Me: “I’m shaking hands with Dumbledore I’ve won the house cup”






validx2:

When you ask your mom a simple question & she yells her response.

image






makochantachibanana:

riversong01:

fulbrite:

HOW TO BECOME A GODDAMN MAGICIAN

1. OWN A TABLET PEN

2. PUT IT DOWN FOR TEN SECONDS

3. ABRACADABRA WHERE THE FUCK DID IT GO

never have I laughed so hard

Best thing a magician can do in .5 seconds






-Everybody, this is Marvin

-We named him after my pop.

-Tell them the full name.

-Marvin Wait For It Eriksen.





314eater:

prevalere:

you know how in some movies the bride/groom calls off the wedding to be with the person they truly love and then they live happily ever after well it’s pretty shitty that the person they were getting married to doesn’t actually get a happy ending but no one seems to care about it to the point that he/she is not even mentioned afterwards as if that person didn’t exist or had feelings at all yeah just a thought

Lord farquaad will be okay










awwww-cute:

My girlfriend’s rat dog doesn’t let me poop in peace

awwww-cute:

My girlfriend’s rat dog doesn’t let me poop in peace





tyleroakley:


latenighthush:

GIRLS ACTUALLY DO THIS
WHEN WE GET REALLY HAPPY LIKE THAT
WE SMILE 
AND CANT STAY STILL
AND GET A LIL BIT EMBARRASSED ABT IT

BOYS DO IT TOO
I CAN CONFIRM

tyleroakley:

latenighthush:

GIRLS ACTUALLY DO THIS

WHEN WE GET REALLY HAPPY LIKE THAT

WE SMILE 

AND CANT STAY STILL

AND GET A LIL BIT EMBARRASSED ABT IT

BOYS DO IT TOO

I CAN CONFIRM